Scarlet Temptress
by Rothelena
Summary: Patrick Jane is supposed to be a wizard with words- so why is he saying the most outrageous things when Lisbon is involved? While the team helps chasing a killer in sunny Venice, Jane thoroughly messes up... and things only go downhill from there... how can he protect her when she hates him? Holiday-fic! Rated M for later chapters!
1. Chapter 1

_Don't expect too much, okay? This is just my annual holiday fic, and I usually write it when the weather is really bad and I need some warmth… at least in writing._

_It usually gets fluffy and romantic down the road… I just don't know how fast. This will be a multi-chapter, but I have no idea how many chapters- 4? 5? More? No idea. We'll see!_

_This will go up to a very strong M in future chapters, but it will be a while until we get there… there are many issues that need to be discussed before our OTP can get down and dirty!_

_Enjoy!_

_Disclaimer: I don't own The Mentalist, and I don't make money from fan fiction._

Chapter 1

„Excuse me, boss," Grace whispered, distinctly green-faced, before she stormed out the room as fast as her legs would carry her.

Lisbon nodded in her direction with obvious compassion before she turned her attention back to the carnage all around her.

Jane stuck to the door, covering nose and mouth with his hand, while Cho and Rigsby slowly walked around the room, perusing every little detail while trying to take in the whole of the crime scene.

"This one sure as hell likes a bloodbath," Lisbon muttered more to herself than to anyone else, but her fellow agents nodded immediately, their features grim and full of concentration.

She allowed herself a moment of bone-deep despair. Another city, another monster in the streets, killing innocents with the force of an explosion. It would never stop, and her powerlessness made her freezing cold despite the hot Venice sun.

She turned around, facing her consultant.

"Any input on this one, Jane?"

He shook his head, his face ghastly pale.

"If you don't care to learn about the nature of my lunch- no."

Lisbon nodded.

"Out with you- get some fresh air."

Before she had finished her sentence, Jane was out, not giving her as much as a nod.

"How does Venice PD call this one?" she asked her men.

Cho looked at her.

"They call him the butcher."

"And isn't that a fitting name." Rigsby sighed.

Lisbon couldn't help silently agreeing with him. The butcher had slaughtered his fourth victim until there was not much left of the utterly attractive woman she had once been- the picture in her file told Lisbon as much. Petite, graceful, perfect features. A gorgeous beauty-queen, now reduced to a pile of meat. She shuddered inwardly.

"Boss," Cho said slowly, his serious, calm voice grounding her like it always did, "Bertram wants to talk to you- outside."

Lisbon closed her eyes in dread. Not Bertram, please. She had no idea how she had managed so far, but to say she felt awkward around him these days would have been a bitter understatement. At least Jane would be there to support her, he would notice immediately when her credibility started to go downhill and jump to her aid. What if Bertram WAS Red John? Damn, how she wished she could just avoid him until they knew for sure. But Bertram was her boss… she couldn't pretend he didn't exist.

She took a deep breath and walked outside, the hot sun burning her skin through her formal clothes. Jane sat on a bench right between herself and Bertram, and when her eyes caught his, he nodded imperceptibly. It had been like a code between them ever since the chips had come down with Red John's threat, a reassurance of him backing her up, no matter what. She immediately felt a lot calmer, her rapid breath slowing down. She couldn't feel her heart beating any longer, she could do this.

"Agent Lisbon," Bertram greeted her, and she was almost a little proud that she didn't force a smile like she would have done in the beginning.

Not too much, Jane had told her. Keep it simple. No grand gestures, no grimaces. The less she lied, the better.

Bertram faced the whole team, and Lisbon was grateful that his attention wandered elsewhere. Business as usual. Maybe this was Red John talking to all of them. She contained the shiver that threatened to take over her body. Calm down, dammit.

"This is the fourth time the butcher has killed," Bertram started, "and the governor has asked me to take over the investigation. The PD's efforts are solid, as you no doubt have seen studying their files. The last chance to get this guy might be to catch him by using a bait he can't resist. I think this team can do that. Do you agree, Agent?"

Lisbon nodded, her mind fully occupied by the case now.

"We absolutely can, director. Since Mr. Jane has put us through several operations like that in the past, we have already experience in this area. I take it the butcher is attracted by very beautiful women, those with movie-star good looks."

She heard Rigsby groan even before Bertram spoke up again.

"That's correct. The women he targeted were pretty introvert, but no doubt stunning beauties, all of them. And certainly, agent Van Pelt fits that description, so she should be the one trying to attract the killer. But… there is an additional problem. There is hardly a thing the butcher's victims have in common despite their obvious good looks. They have differed greatly in age, race, color of hair and eyes. But there is one physical trait they all have in common."

Lisbon had read the victims' files thoroughly and had no problem comparing them in her mind in a moment's notice.

"All of them were… small."

Bertram nodded gravely.

"Exactly. The butcher likes his women tiny, petite. And Van Pelt is much taller than the women he pursued so far. That makes me think it would be a good idea to take you, Agent Lisbon, into the equation as well. We would double our chances to catch the monster if both of you played the bait."

Lisbon could feel it- Jane had risen from the bench, and she didn't even need to turn around to know that he was upset.

"What?" he exclaimed," wait… you can't be serious, really, you can't. Lisbon NEVER does this kind of thing, we always choose Grace when we need an attractive bait, so she already has experience doing it, and taken the visual aspect, she's obviously the best choice in this case, too."

Lisbon gritted her teeth, her hands clenching involuntarily. So he didn't think she was beautiful enough to attract the killer, or what?

Bile rose in her throat, making her eyes water with disappointment and anger. Ever since Red John had changed his rules, he had tried to make clear that there wasn't anything between them but friendship, and she had hated every second of it. Because her dreams hadn't changed. Because he had taken to following her everywhere, not letting her out of his sight for a second, and being close to him reminded her of the things she would never have, things she wanted so much it felt like acid being poured over her skin every second, every day. He wouldn't talk to her about it. But he was always there, watching her, as if she were a priced jewel he had to protect at all costs. He just didn't want her.

She looked at him, there was confusion and some kind of despair on his face, and she felt hurt and torn, all her hope bleeding out inside.

He didn't love her, he didn't find her attractive.

And what was even worse- deep down she couldn't help thinking that he might be right.

Xxxx

Jane knew he was struggling to make a point when words usually never left him, and he didn't like it at all. Damn the perpetual confusion Teresa Lisbon inflicted on his aching heart, seeping into his thoughts, his very mind he had always been able to trust. Nowadays, he could hardly think when she was involved, the tender longing for her messing with his cool like nothing else ever had.

Why was it so hard to keep their relationship casual, harmless, when he had never had any problems to manipulate his own feelings before?

He felt his mind clouding over with fear and hurt, coloring his vision until he couldn't form a straight sentence any longer. But he couldn't let her do this!

"I mean, Lisbon has no experience in attracting men, because it's… seduction is not really her forte, I mean, no offense, but… it's not what she does."

Damn, that came over much differently than he had planned.

"I would shut up now if I were you, buddy." Cho whispered next to him.

But Jane couldn't stop. He couldn't let Teresa run around trying to attract a killer when he had worked like a maniac to get another one off her tracks, dammit! Wasn't she in enough danger with Red John closer than ever before? He wouldn't allow her to become a new target for the next lunatic around!

"You know how I mean that, Lisbon- I mean, it's not as if you attract a lot…I mean you didn't have much…"

He imagined her, walking foreign streets scantily clad, trying to attract a man who did… THAT to his victims! He saw red.

"Gale," he growled, routinely hiding his suspicions against the director behind an impenetrable front, "I'm sure Grace can do it on her own, and it's much easier to protect one single agent, we don't need a second choice…"

"Second choice?" Lisbon hissed next to him, and he knew he had lost.

Again he couldn't help wondering why his charm always failed him when his fierce little partner was involved. But he couldn't help it- he plowed on. Looking at Lisbon, he lowered his voice.

"Do you even have… that kind of clothes? I bet even your bathing suit is more of the… formal kind."

"What?" she snarled, "so you think I own nothing but matronly clothes which could never attract men anyway?"

He frantically searched his mind for a way to put this mildly, but it was already too late. Lisbon's stare became icy before she turned away and looked at Bertram.

"Director, I want to do it. And don't worry- I CAN dress up for an operation like that."

"What about your acting abilities?," Jane whined, "You do realize they are…"

"Stop it now, Jane," she hissed, "this discussion is over, you made your point, and I'm not interested in your opinion."

An icy cold shudder ran over Jane's spine, but one look at Lisbon told him all he needed to know: the issue was settled, and he had messed up like a boss.

He sighed and looked down.

How will I protect you, little bird, when you affect me that much? When you make me feel things I can never feel again?

He hugged his own body, feeling his upset stomach churn with nausea and naked fear.

Xxxxxxxxxx

Lisbon was a mixture of seething anger and obvious unease when she strolled through the fancy Venice shops later.

Okay- so she didn't really own a sexy bikini, her bathing suit was sporty and designed for brisk swimming exercise instead of tempting men into losing their composure- but she would never admit that to Jane in a million years!

She still remembered his words, every single one of them stinging like hell, sending hot gushes of shame and sheer pain into her heart.

She knew she wasn't beauty-queen material. She had never strived for that kind of thing, had always worked hard to become the best cop she could be instead.

But she was in love. And was it wrong that she wanted to be beautiful to this one man alone?

She growled inwardly. Well, he had made his opinion clear, and she wouldn't cry about him. Well, she had. A little. Okay, a lot. But that was OVER now!

She grabbed a skimpy, fire-engine red bikini made from hardly enough fabric to cover the most important parts and marched into the changing room. She undressed without looking into the mirror once, uncomfortable enough to feel her skin crawl.

Yes, she didn't like it at all. Jane was right, dammit- she was no seductress, that wasn't her thing, and at the moment she felt so raw and unhappy that her acting might be even worse than usual. She could definitely need a holiday. But that was delusional- she would only spend it fantasizing about Jane, and THAT was one thing she definitely didn't need at the moment. By the way, knowing Jane, with Red John on the prowl he would never let her out of his sight anyway.

She sighed and turned, facing the mirror boldly.

Okay. She was a little too muscular for a beach bunny, but otherwise… not too awful. Her body looked like lots of functional exercise, done to make her strong, not sexy, but she WAS petite (she had often cursed her tininess), so it might work after all. She even had a slight hint of hour-glass shape… okay, not really. But… a little? Teeny weeny bit?

She turned around in front of the mirror.

Her stomach was absolutely flat, no surprise- there were about a billion crunches behind it. Her breast were no show, but hey… if they wanted petite, they couldn't expect a curvy thunderstorm, could they? She was enough, and that might be all that counted.

Okay, bright red was risky, but the butcher's latest victim had worn a golden bikini when she'd been attacked, so maybe it didn't hurt to go a little over the top with the color.

She changed back into her professional pantsuit and walked to the cashier before she could change her mind, grabbing an matching red sarong to wrap around her hips… anything to make her feel a little less naked.

Having paid her skimpy purchase, Agent Lisbon walked outside, the merciless sun plastering her blouse and suit to her skin in seconds. She tried to take deep breaths.

And went on to pretend nothing about this unnerved her.

TBC

_So- how is that so far? Next chapter up tomorrow! See you then, I hope!_


	2. Chapter 2

_Okay… I wrote chapter 3 today, and I have really bad news for the fluff-lovers among you: this is getting A LOT angstier than I intended, and I don't have a real choice about that… so I hope you don't mind. I can promise you a happy ending, although Red John will still be in the picture… but at least, I'll make both of them act true to their feelings, so don't worry. I just have to lead you into the valley first… sorry, but I guess the finale didn't leave happy-peppy vibes with me (although I loved it so much!)._

_About the OOCness that has been mentioned: it's true. I like to make Jane lose control when he never does so on the show, so I push and kick him a little until he behaves in strange ways… I like it that way, but it's true that I tend to send him roads he might not travel in an actual episode. If that's not what you like: do not read this story!_

_Thank you so much for your feedback- it means the world to me and encourages me to go on even if stories take other directions than what I planned for them- bear with me, there's light at the end of the tunnel!_

_Disclaimer: I don't own "The Mentalist", and I don't make money from fan fiction._

Chapter 2

Jane sat inside his hotel room and felt feverish with dread. How could he stop her?

With a sigh he flopped down on his bed. He knew he couldn't, because he had pretty much insulted her with his poor choice of words. Now she thought he didn't find her attractive, which couldn't be farther from the truth.

His hands brushed over the plushy comforter beneath him while he imagined touching her soft skin instead, saw a happy, relaxed Lisbon in front of his mind's eye, sated from hours of lovemaking… he briskly shook his head to clear his traitorous mind, welcoming the coldness back inside, a numbness he needed to function. He couldn't have Teresa Lisbon. Because she needed to be protected from Red John, and he was the only one who could do that- by keeping his distance. By making his nemesis believe that Lisbon was nothing but his partner… after all, that was bad enough.

To make her his lover would mean giving her Angela's position in his life. And with a bitter, searing pain that pierced his heart he acknowledged that there was no place more dangerous than that.

For a moment he allowed himself to dream. What would it be like, moving on? Lisbon pregnant with his child. Them buying a house together, getting a dog, quarreling about open toilet lids… he sighed with longing, tears bubbling up his throat.

No. That was delusional. He would never have that again, and it would be cruel to inflict his damaged life on sweet little Teresa.

Agent Lisbon who was about to risk her life in a reckless, stupid maneuver to tempt a killer.

He had to stop this, now.

He jumped to his feet and raced to the door, when a distinctive knock made him freeze.

He opened cautiously. Bertram stood on the doorstep, immediately stepping over the threshold, invading his personal space. Jane didn't back off. They eyed each other coldly.

"Director Bertram." Jane drawled. "May I help you?"

Bertram smiled an icy smile.

"I'm just here to escort you to the surveillance van- to make sure you don't attempt to follow Lisbon on your own."

A freezing shudder ran down Jane's spine, but he had no problem masking it.

"She's my colleague. She has no experience with undercover operations like this, unlike Grace, who has played the bait for us before. I just want to make sure everybody stays safe."

Bertram's grin deepened.

"I think you're underestimating Agent Lisbon, Mr. Jane. I have trained personnel following her and Agent Van Pelt everywhere, so you absolutely don't need to worry. If you would accompany me to the surveillance van now, please?"

Jane wanted to protest, desperately, but he couldn't risk making his concern look even more suspicious than it already did. After all, he could be talking to Red John this very moment. So he nodded curtly and followed Bertram to the van.

In fact, it was more like an oversized truck, parked close to the beach in a car park, surrounded by other large delivery trucks.

Jane could hear the noise of the Venice strip, see a hint of scantily clad bodies now and then. He almost whimpered. One of them was the woman he… his partner.

It was stifling hot inside the van, Rigsby and Cho nodded at him in quiet, equally concerned greeting. A CBI technician manned the monitors, the crackling reports of faceless agents filling the space around them, their voices oozing from several loudspeakers all over the crowded room.

Jane was glad when Bertram immediately left to have lunch with the governor, and released a relieved breath. He was sweating and felt dizzy from lack of food, but he stubbornly remained standing, much too nervous to sit still anyway.

"Subject B on its way to the strip now." The bodiless voice from the radio crackled.

Rigsby looked at Jane.

"Subject A is Grace, subject B Lisbon."

Jane's blood went hot- subject? That was his Teresa, risking her life dressing up for a monster!

He started pacing the free square meter of space he had, his skin itching with the need to find her, protect her.

It was ingrained into his soul- save her, kill for her, die for her. Protect her with your very life.

He felt like a caged tiger.

Xxxxxxxxxx

Time to find comfort in the small things- at least she had no difficulties walking on high heels. She gave her hips what she thought to be an enticing sway and tried to ignore the quite obviously interested looks of the strange men passing her by.

Sure, it was somehow flattering. Especially since a certain someone obviously didn't find her sexy at all. But mostly she felt nauseous from the chills the whole situation gave her, a stranger inside her own skin.

If somebody dared to touch her, she would throttle him on the spot.

She tried to recall the facts from her files, which served the purpose to make her look mentally occupied, unsuspicious. While the victims she tried to imitate had been extremely attractive, they hadn't been risky in their sexual behavior. All of them had come out of long relationships, had been freshly separated, maybe looking for a change, the proof that they still had been able to attract men after having lost the loves of their lives.

She had never had the love of her life. Oh, how she wished that he could see her now. But maybe he would just shrug and yawn pointedly. Not interested at all, thank you very much.

She berated herself silently. Was she crazy, thinking girlish, self-pitying thoughts in the middle of an undercover mission? Time to focus, Agent!

She'd been out and about for several hours now, had sat on the beach for a while, smiling at countless flirty men, avoiding closer contact as good as she could, not wanting to initiate anything on her own. Since all the killed women hadn't been great seductresses, the butcher shouldn't be surprised that she was nervous as hell, so she didn't try too hard to hide it.

What had Jane said? As close to the truth as possible.

Her feet aching in her sexy stiletto heels, she retreated to the next bar in the evening. It was a fairly harmless one, beachy interior, lots of tourists, nothing shady.

She ordered a Sex on the Beach, because it was the first fashionable girls' drink that came to her mind, and watched the other guests discreetly. She hated sweetish alcoholic beverages, but hey- all for the cover.

"How did such a gorgeous woman manage to be all alone at this social time of the evening?"

She felt her skin prickle. It wasn't that she hadn't heard these words countless times in different variations all day, but this time, her instincts chimed in. She turned slowly, not bothering to fake a smile, but aiming for innocent curiosity instead. He looked normal. Harmless. Middle brown hair, pretty tall, not unattractive. But while his disguise might be sufficient for heart-broken beauty-queens turned housewives, he was no Patrick Jane or Red John… and she was a cop.

Her alarm bells rang full force. This was their man.

She smiled briefly and tried to turn up her sexy. The point was trying, she didn't need to flash him away, he liked the awkward ones.

"So why wouldn't you redeem that?" she said softly, almost shyly, and pretended to take a sip from her drink.

Xxxxxxxxxx

"Subject B lost- I repeat, we lost her."

Jane almost screamed with fury.

"What?" he exclaimed, "That can't be happening, what kind of idiots did you put on her trail, dammit? She might be alone with a maniac killer right now!"

"Stay calm," Rigsby said, but his face showed equal concern, "the boss can fight for herself, she's tough as nails."

Jane stared at him.

"Are you out of your mind? Did you see what he DID to these poor women? I want Lisbon back, immediately!"

He knew he sounded like a moody kid demanding his favorite toy, but he didn't give a damn. If Lisbon didn't reappear on the radar right now, he would go looking for her himself!

His cellphone rang, and he answered it briskly, anger and worry coloring his voice.

Lisbon sounded slightly breathless, but not in pain, and the relief coursing through his body was so strong everything went black for a second.

"Jane- send a team my way. I got him."

Xxxxxxxxxx

When Serious Crimes arrived at the address Lisbon had given them, first responders were already working, the killer handcuffed and stowed into a car on his way to the police department.

Jane's eyes kept frantically searching for Lisbon, but when he found her, he stopped dead in his tracks.

Holy hell.

She wore a tiny, flaming red bikini, almost like a blinking arrow marking her as prey. And damn… what a body. He wasn't surprised, though. He'd always known she was a beauty, but she was HIS beauty for god sake. No… he didn't really mean it that way, what he meant was… oh, what the hey.

He stormed over to the corner where she was standing, trying to use his own frame to hide her from any leering gazes. She tried to play it cool, but this was Teresa Lisbon, and she could hide nothing from him.

She was so relieved to see him, it warmed his heart.

He stepped up to her, so close her pert little breasts brushed against his shirt. He looked down, took in her slim, freckled shoulders, the graceful column of her neck, the pale décolleté. She was exquisite, and he swallowed drily.

"Are you alright?" he said, his voice soft and gentle, exhaling slowly in relief when she nodded.

"There was a short fight, but he's no Red John. He wasn't up for the whole thing. I think Venice PD might have been able to do this operation themselves, they just got scared by the massacres he made of his killings. But his rage was more impressive than his method. He was careless. We have a whole bunch of DNA to match with his. He's toast."

Jane nodded solemnly.

He clenched his hands to stop himself from touching her, cause there was nothing he wanted more at the moment. An EMT handed him a blanket and he unfolded it, carefully wrapping Lisbon's small body in the fabric.

"Jane," she said, "it's about 4000 degrees around here. I don't need a blanket, really."

"Then let's get you to the hotel, so you can change out of these clothes."

She got defiant in a matter of seconds, and he scolded himself. Damn his feelings, they made a fool out of him, and he was doing a great job with not loving her, really. BRILLIANT work, Jane.

"You don't like them?" she asked, her voice cold.

"I like them," he said without really thinking, all kinds of feelings chasing each other in his mind, "I just don't like you wearing them."

Damn, that sounded as if…

"Too bad, Jane," she snarled, "I like wearing them."

She pushed the blanket from her shoulders and walked away without giving him another glance, only to be stopped by Bertram.

"Venice PD wants to thank us for the good job," the director started," and offers all of you a free stay for the next two weeks, right after you finished the interviews with the butcher- I'm willing to grant the core team a little holiday, you deserve it, and summer is a slow time in the office anyway. I could call you back when I need you, so why not enjoy the sun and the beach until then, huh?"

Lisbon turned and glared at Jane, who was mighty distracted by her enticing backside.

When she faced Bertram again, the air was thick enough to cut it with a knife.

"That sounds great, director," she said sweetly, "I think we all could need a little relaxation."

She stormed out of the room before Jane could say anything.

TBC

_Next chapter uppppp…. Tomorrow! Brace herself, that one will be pretty angsty… sorry! Thank you so much for your support!_


	3. Chapter 3

_I have such a bad conscience for doing that to you, but I have a certain way I want this story to go, and believe me- the angst will pay off! Chapter 3 is simply bitter, chapter 4 is bittersweet- and chapter 5 will earn this story it's rating ;D! So bear with me!_

_Thank you so much for all your support and your feedback- it's SO MUCH appreciated, believe me!_

_And now- on to the angst…_

_Disclaimer: I don't own The Mentalist, and I don't make money from fan fiction._

Chapter 3

Jane sat in his hotel room and watched the darkness creep up in front of his window.

What the hell was the matter with him?

He was supposed to be the wonder boy with the golden tongue, the devil who could charm anyone, anytime, with a few well-chosen words.

So why did he lose all of his precious abilities when it came to Lisbon? He NEVER insulted anyone if he didn't WANT to, and still he had offended her without meaning to- twice. In one day.

He'd only been like this with one other person before.

His smile was sad and woebegone. Angela Ruskin. Damn, had he stumbled over his tongue on countless occasions when he'd been with her… she had slapped him about twenty times before she had stooped to kiss him.

One time, before they had really been a couple, he had told her: "I don't want all the beautiful girls- I want you!" Ouch. She had locked him into a stationary cupboard he had the bad luck standing right in front of at that very moment. He had peed his pants before she'd finally let him out of there.

He smiled at the memory, tears welling up in his eyes.

Maybe it was better if Lisbon thought that he didn't find her beautiful. Maybe it would protect her. It was a great idea to make her hate him.

If it only wouldn't hurt so much. He couldn't let her run around in skimpy bikinis, flirting with lecherous men just to get back at him. Damn, he was stupid. But he had no choice. Love made a babbling idiot out of him, which was why he had been so intent on avoiding it for the rest of his life. But his fierce little minx had come and taken his heart in the still of the night, and he was fighting a losing battle in trying to keep things friendly. There was nothing friendly about his dreams. The need to touch her. The way her closeness gave him peace, grounded him, made him feel honorable and worthy again. And, yes- it made him horny, too.

He got up slowly and walked to the window, looking down to the sparkling row of lights, the brightly dressed party-crowd moving along like faceless animals.

He should let her in peace, allow her to find a good, dependable man, to finally get happy after all the years he had drained her of her energy.

But he was selfish and scared, so he needed to watch her, follow her everywhere to make sure she was safe. He hated this holiday on unknown territory, hated that he wasn't back in his car in front of her apartment where he had slept those past weeks, arriving like a thief in the night, to watch out over her like a dark guardian angel. It was his need, he went crazy when he didn't know where she was, who was with her, if she was really, really safe.

Although she'd never be safe as long as she was with him. He had brought this upon her, had lured Red John out of hiding, had made the killer more dangerous than he'd already been. The fun was over, and all he could do was holding his hand over Lisbon as good as he could.

He got antsy, his need to see her right now as insurmountable as a fatal disease. He couldn't let her go.

And he sure as hell couldn't let her believe that he didn't find her beautiful.

Xxxxxxxxxx

Turquoise? Seriously?

Lisbon sighed an exasperated sigh and continued to be decidedly… indecisive.

These weren't her colors, there was no doubt about it, and how stupid was the male population that it was totally oblivious to that? She was pretty much flashing "awkward" with every step she took. But it was unbelievable how many compliments she got, a great bunch of them by men much younger than she was.

She'd been shy at first. Then she had started smiling back.

But all the flirting didn't help the fact that she was terribly lonely.

Jane hadn't been sighted since they had the little fight after she had made the arrest. He'd been gone all the time, while the team had conducted the interviews and wrapped the PD an airtight package.

She had found herself standing in front of his hotel room more than once, but had never dared to knock.

Why wouldn't he fight for her? Oh, yes. He didn't want her, right. He possibly saw her as some kind of little sister… she grimaced involuntarily. If he knew what she was doing to him every night in her dreams, when it seemed safe to let her fantasies rule the game….

She groaned, angry at herself. Would she ever get over this? She guessed not, since she had never been in love like this before. How had he done it? Tenderness flared inside her like a flame, and she felt the tears well in her eyes. She loved him. Period. There was no denying it, no smoothing it over with less dangerous words, she couldn't even hide it from herself any longer.

She had almost died from jealousy while Lorelei Martins had been in his life. But truth was, she wasn't any closer to his heart now. Because he just didn't have any feelings for her.

"Whatcha drink?"

The bartender was a gray-haired, bearded trunk of a man, smiling benevolently at her. She hadn't even noticed that she had stepped up to the counter of a cozy-looking beach bar, lost in futile thoughts that would kill her one day.

But why not?

"Beer," she nodded, "preferably so cold it numbs my tongue… and everything else while it's at it."

He chuckled.

"Comin'."

A solid body brushed past her, and she felt two hands on her shoulders.

"Excuse me," a warm male voice drawled, and he lingered a bit longer than he should have.

Lisbon turned a little. Young, muscular, shaggy surfer hair. AND HE WAS TOUCHING HER. She almost slugged him, her forced smile obviously coming over as pretty hostile given the slightly scared face he made.

She almost sighed in relief when he took his hands from her skin.

Damn, how would she ever attract a man if she couldn't stand being touched?

Truth was simple and painful: she wouldn't.

She took a sip of her blissfully icy beer and felt so lonely it hurt like a hole in her chest.

Xxxxxxxxxx

Jane straightened when this obnoxious guy didn't take his hands from her shoulders immediately, but Lisbon took care of it herself and glared him away seconds later.

He behaved like an idiot, dammit. He WANTED her to find a nice guy, remember? But deep down, he did a poor job hiding the fact that it was the last thing he wanted.

Heavens, she was breathtaking. He wouldn't have been able to look away if he'd tried. Her body was slim and toned, she was lithe and graceful, every movement a soft, dancing slide now that she didn't need to adopt her usual cop-stance. He had never seen her in holiday-mode, and it did unbelievable things to his equilibrium. He didn't like it at all.

He had followed her all day, keeping his distance so he wouldn't alarm her, watching closely for anyone who could pose a threat to her. Secretly hating the guys who stared at her, wishing she would cover herself, hide what was so precious and beautiful to him it made his eyes water with longing.

He licked over his dry lips and ordered another tea with a short movement of his hand.

It was plainly visible that she was uncomfortable, playing a role that wasn't her, and Lisbon had always been a total failure at pretending. They were two lonely strangers in a world where everything was fake. Despite the outrageously flashy colors and the embarrassingly small amount of fabric she wore, she looked so innocent like this, as if she had shed her armor and stood before him pure and vulnerable, even smaller than she looked in her smart suits. Everything about her was tiny, and all he wanted was to pull her into his embrace and tell her that everything was alright, that he could see her, that there wasn't a reason to playact.

But she wasn't his. Red John was lurking, and he had no doubt he would enjoy killing his second wife as well. Show him there was nothing he couldn't, wouldn't take from him.

He straightened again. Lisbon was talking to a guy who seemed to be a little smarter than the other ones had been, at least she didn't push him away. White-hot jealousy pierced his heart like a flash of lightning, and he had to grit his teeth not to make a sound.

It took only a few minutes before the stranger touched her, putting his hand on her bare back, and while she still shrunk away a little, she didn't stop the travesty.

Jane almost screamed, his insides clotted with noise, his stomach knotting into an angry fist of fear and hate. He couldn't lose her. But she wasn't his, dammit! He followed them when they got up, his knees wobbling dangerously when he swiftly paid his bill.

He couldn't be losing her. He was a selfish bastard, but there was no way in hell how he could let her go.

His absolution. His angel. His one source of warmth in a world made of ice.

But the tenderness was undermined by a rage he had hardly ever felt before, coloring his vision bright red, turning him into a vicious, vengeful beast.

Xxxxxxxxxx

James was good-looking and extremely nice, and Lisbon felt torn between her wish to gently get rid of him and just give in, start anew, burn her charred emotional bridges once and for all.

But her feelings for Jane throbbed like a separate pulse deep inside her heart, and even now, she couldn't stop thinking about him, wondering where he was, if he was safe and content.

She smiled at James, who made polite, interesting conversation, and knew she couldn't do it. But something inside her guided her along as if she were on autopilot, an urge to survive, to prove to herself that she could still do it.

When he took her hand, she didn't object, although something inside her told her to run. And when he leaned over to press a soft kiss on her lips, she felt paralyzed with a mixture of shock and confusion.

"Lisbon!"

Jane's voice was a dangerous growl, but loud enough to pierce the lush evening's quiet with ease.

James backed off, casting a confused glance at her.

Jane's vibe was possessive and territorial, he eyed James like a piece of vermin, his glare so intense the taller, younger man shrunk in front of her eyes.

"Time to scram." Jane whispered menacingly, tilting his head in the general direction he thought James should vanish.

James' breathing accelerated.

"Weeeellll… I'll leave you two to… sort out your differences."

He was off so fast his steps echoed from the pavement in a rapid staccato.

"What in hell do you think you're doing?" she hissed.

"What do YOU think you're doing? Are you out of your mind? Picking up total strangers in a beach bar, dressed in… IN THAT?"

She couldn't help the notion that somehow, he was right. She felt cheap and stupid, the imprint of James' kiss burning unpleasantly on her lips. How could she have let him kiss her? She had felt nothing for him!

But she would NEVER tell that to the annoying, outraged guy in front of her.

"That's none of your business, Jane. Remember? You didn't find me that attractive, so don't get hysterical when other men do!"

He leaned down, thoroughly invading her personal space. She caught his scent, clean, masculine, slightly spicy, clearing her mind while making it fog over at the same time. She inhaled deeply, the pheromones inside her blood making her panties wet. His lips looked so luscious. Pale and soft, curving over perfect, pearly teeth. His eyes were glowing beacons, bright, jade-colored crystals drilling into her soul.

But his next words made her feel as if she had been doused with a bucket of ice water.

"This is not about my feelings! It's about the fact that you have been behaving ridiculously ever since this holiday started! I have to say, your midlife crisis is starting mighty early! This isn't you, Lisbon, strutting around with an "Eat Me" label around your neck, trying to attract any stray cat you can find. Look at you, dammit, you are dressed like a whore!"

She could see the shock in his eyes, saw him recoil as if he expected the sting of her slap, and she was truly, sorely tempted.

But she felt as if her flesh was scraped from her bones, raw, vulnerable, so emotional there seemed to be an ocean of pain and un-cried tears filling her, making her burst at the seams.

And no matter how hurtful his words were- he was right, and inside all the aching woundedness, she felt almost relieved. She could stop pretending now.

She approached him cautiously, saw his wide eyes, moist, horrified. He had lost control when he never did, not when Red John wasn't involved. But his nemesis' threat had messed with his mind, and things had changed between them. His protectiveness was frantic, uncontrolled, and he was obviously shocked at the force himself.

She stood ramrod straight, turning her glare to ice.

"You know what, Jane? You're right. This isn't me. I tried to play a role to find a place where I can belong, and that was stupid. I'm a bad actress, a bad liar, and this is all fake. The make-up, the bikini, the ridiculous stiletto heels."

She slipped them off and threw them as hard as she could, taking a deep breath of relief when they hit a dumpster with loud metallic clatter.

She looked at him, feeling much calmer than she had thought she would.

"If you'll excuse me now. I would like to take a bath. I hope you have a pleasant evening."

Slowly releasing a pent-up breath, she turned and walked away, putting her chin up regally.

Something inside her hurt so bad. But now, she was almost used to it.

Xxxxxxxxxx

Jane looked after her, shocked into speechlessness. Everything inside him screamed, bloody claws raking over his torn flesh. What had he done?

He wanted to run, catch her, shove her against the next wall and pour the truth into her face, let the caress of his lips say what he couldn't, mustn't tell her.

He couldn't believe she hadn't slapped him, when he had longed to slap himself, hard.

His hot blood cooled down, and he felt dizzy all of a sudden, sinking down on the pavement, clutching his aching chest while he tried to catch his breath.

And the darkness around him was nothing against the blackness descending over his soul, for his light was gone.

TBC

_Ouch, ouch, double ouch. Sorry for that. But Thalia is not feeling happy right now, and she's whispering all kinds of moody things into my ear… things will light up, really! Next chapter up- tomorrow! It's already written, so I can PROMISE it!_


	4. Chapter 4

_STAY STRONG! This is the last chapter that will be angsty, chapter 5 will be… something else ;D. little hint: one of them sees reason next chapter, so don't despair! Rescue is near. Chapter 5 is finished (about five minutes ago ;D), so I absolutely GUARANTEE that I will post it tomorrow!_

_Thank you so much for your ongoing support- I'm so glad you're still with me!_

_Disclaimer: I don't own The Mentalist, and I don't make money from fan fiction._

Chapter 4

As soon as Lisbon entered her stifling hot hotel room, she raced into the bathroom to wipe the make-up from her face with angry roughness. The mascara was all over her cheeks in black streaks, washed away by the childish tears she had cried on her way home.

Home. Only this wasn't home, and she had no idea how to finish her holidays now. Doing tourist stuff, all alone? She wasn't really in the mood for that. Maybe she would try to get some sleep and head home tomorrow, back to Sacramento, where she could wallow in self-pity on her couch, eating tons of ice cream. Only her stomach felt as if she would never be able to consume food again. She hadn't eaten anything substantial in days and felt slightly woozy, the alcohol she had drank earlier kicking in full force now.

Damn, she was so stupid, behaving like an untried teenager. She was almost glad Jane had saved her from herself, even though he'd been a complete jerk.

She looked at her reflection in the mirror. So she didn't really want a random man. And the one she wanted didn't want her. So where did this leave her?

Alone.

Sighing deeply, she let herself sink down onto the soft mattress, begging for a deep slumber she already knew would never come. How had she gotten herself into this mess in the first place? Yesterday, Patrick Jane had been nothing but a cute, annoying difficulty. How had he come to form her whole world?

Some hours later she had tried every trick in the book to finally doze of- no success. Scanning the room for some brainless pastime that would exhaust her enough to fall into a coma, she was interrupted by a tentative knock on the door.

Oh no. When would it ever end?

Xxxxxxxxxx

She opened the door looking so small he dug his fingers into his thighs to stop himself from pulling her close, let her melt into his arms until she stopped shaking.

They stared at each other for a few moments, neither of them saying anything.

"Can I come in?" He asked softly.

The last thing he wanted was another fight, so he treaded carefully, treating her like the wounded bird she was.

She nodded slowly and let him pass.

The bed was in wild disarray, and she sat down in the middle of it, her back against the headrest. He recognized the defensiveness of the position, she protected her vital parts, avoided showing him her back. He almost groaned in pain. He deserved this, so he shouldn't be surprised.

He sat down on the edge of the mattress, careful not to come too close too fast.

"Teresa," he started, "I don't even think I have the words to tell you how sorry I am. I don't know what's the matter with me- Red John's threat has been messing with my mind lately, but that doesn't justify me hurting my best friend, the one person who means most to me. I can't go on without you, Lisbon, and I… freak out when you go where I can't see you, can't protect you."

"Jane," she said calmly, "how often do I have to tell you that you don't need to…"

"I know," he interrupted her, scooting a little closer, "I know you can fend for yourself- you just tackled a serial killer twice your size. But that doesn't change my feelings, Teresa. I need to watch out over you, or I get sick with worry. So can you please indulge me? Stay close and take care, just to reassure me that nothing will happen to you? And NOT try to look hot for crazy murderers who make minced meat out of their victims?"

She smiled, and it was as if the sun was back into his life, warming his frozen skin until it glowed with pleasure.

He moved a little closer.

"There's one thing I need to tell you, Teresa. To me, you are the most beautiful woman in the world, just the way you are. And you don't need to play a role to be gorgeous. Although… that red bikini…"

She slapped his shoulder playfully, and they laughed together, a quiet rumble that helped to clear the air. He fought the need to touch her, like an ache deep inside of him, pushing him closer than he could ever be. Tears rose in his throat, and he desperately wished he could start again, with her, be finally free of the past.

He brushed his fingers through her silky hair, lost and defeated, unable to resist, mesmerized by the way the faint light caught in her dark tresses. She was breathtaking, her mouth small and plump, luscious, made for his kiss. Her eyes glistened with moisture, and it would have been so easy, so temptingly easy to cover the distance and show her how much she truly meant to him.

And still, he couldn't.

"I know you feel alone," he whispered, his voice trembling slightly, "so let's do what we're good at: let's be partners. Spend tomorrow with me, Lisbon. I know some beautiful spots in this area, let me show some of them to you. Let me help you relax. I want to, really."

She sighed. She looked so tired, and he needed to hold her so bad.

"Okay," she said after a while, "why not?"

He smiled his brightest smile, the one he only reserved for her.

"9 a.m. in front of the hotel, okay? Now lay down."

"Why?"

He frowned at her.

"Just do it, Lisbon. Lay down."

When she did so reluctantly, he covered her with the blanket.

He told her whatever came to his mind, making his voice soft and alluring, like a stream of water gently gushing over a bed of smooth pebbles.

Her eyelids became heavy in no time, he saw them flutter shut, her lips parting slightly when she fell asleep.

He knew it was wrong, but he couldn't help the urge inside of him. He pressed a gentle kiss on her temple, letting his lips linger just a little, giving her soft skin a short caress with his tongue.

And then, he forced himself to leave.

Xxxxxxxxxx

When he met her the next morning after a thoroughly sleepless night, his idea seemed even more grotesque than it had in the nocturnal hours of insomnia.

Lisbon stood in front of the hotel, her shiny hair resting in luscious waves on her shoulders, her freckles out full force due to the summer sun, wearing a sleeveless green dress that ended several inches above her knee. To say she had great legs would have been the understatement of the century. The soft fabric hugged her frame, showing off her small, firm breasts which perfectly fit her petite body.

He groaned inwardly. How was he supposed to keep things between them harmless when she looked like that?

He had decided to go without the jacket today and rolled up his sleeves to be more comfortable in the heat. He almost blushed when he saw her eyes wander to his bare forearms, the pupils going wide with appreciation. Damn, if he could only do as he wanted…

"Too much?" she asked shyly.

He shook his head.

"You're gorgeous. But forgive me if I have to hit every guy who leers at you."

She chuckled, the slight blush clearly visible on her pale skin.

He put his hand on the small of her back and guided her to the next bus stop, which was only a few steps from the hotel.

"We go by bus?" she asked.

"You see nothing of a city when you sit inside a car, Lisbon," he answered, "this is much better."

Xxxxxxxxxxx

Untrue… this was hell. The bus was overcrowded, which meant they had to stay. Close. Close enough for her to feel every detail of his body, the hardness of his chest, his hand on her hip to keep her from stumbling when the bus halted. He pointed out several points of interest, his voice calm and relaxed. So he was obviously unfazed by the closeness between them, that there was practically not an ounce of space left between them.

She suppressed a groan. He was intent on not letting anything happen, but she would enjoy every second shamelessly. This might be all she would ever get, so she would make the best of it.

Leaning back against him, savoring the feeling of his arm going around her middle on instinct, she tried to listen to him, although her focus wasn't the best today.

He led her to the Los Angeles Zoo first. It had been eons since Lisbon had been inside a zoo for anything else than catching killers, and Jane was so utterly enthusiastic it was contagious. He knew every little detail about the animals, the best spots to get treats, the times the different species were fed.

He offered her his cone to taste his choice of ice cream, and she closed her eyes when she lapped at the sweet stuff, childishly thinking it might be the closest she would ever get to a kiss from him.

They lay in the grass and watched the clouds move, talking in soft, hushed voices, whispers meant for nobody but themselves.

She was as relaxed as she hadn't been in years, and he laughed with her, showed her a happiness she had craved all these past months, a reminder that life could be different, perfused by light and warmth. She felt at home in the middle of a foreign city, and all the time he was so close, his hand resting comfortably on her body, a warm, firm weight that kept her focused, the feeling so good she held her breath so he wouldn't stop touching her.

How easy it was to imagine a different universe. She almost cried whenever reality threatened to intrude, but he always managed to do something that made her smile again. He took her hand and led her off to the next adventure, and there was no time to be scared.

She knew the night would come soon, because no matter how much she wished to avoid it, it was never far these days.

xxxxxxxxxx

"I can't crack the shell, Jane," Lisbon whined, looking adorable with her trademark sweet pout.

"It's not a shell, Lisbon," Jane chuckled softly, "it's a carapace, and you don't really need to crack it. The lobster's carapace is divided into several segments, you just have to break the whole thing in half- like this. Then you break every single segment- like this- and peel them off the flesh. Et voila."

"What do you do with these?"

He smiled.

"Lobster tongs. You use them to crack the pincers- like this."

She struggled until he gently took the instrument from her hands and did it for her.

She grinned cheekily.

"Why do I have to eat posh food anyway?"

"You need to try it because it's absolutely delicious."

He filled his fork, dipped it into the sauce and offered it to her. She gingerly took the bite… and closed her eyes in bliss.

"Hmmmmm…. okay, that IS delicious…."

"Told you. This is one of the best restaurants in Los Angeles, and the best lobster around."

He couldn't stop watching her. How tempting to give into the fantasy, to let this day end the way it should. But he couldn't.

She was meant for him. The only one who had managed to crack the icy wall he had built around his heart after he had lost his reason to live. She had protected him, worried for him, saved him countless times. She had cried and longed and finally fallen in love. She deserved to get whatever she wanted.

And still it couldn't be.

He had never doubted that Red John would destroy his life in every aspect possible, so he shouldn't be surprised. But it hurt nonetheless.

When they had finished their dinner he led her outside, into the dark night, the day's heat still palpable around them.

She turned and looked at him, her hair tousled by the slight breeze.

"Thank you, Jane," she whispered, and her voice carried a sadness that made him ache all over, "that was a wonderful day, and I'm never going to forget it."

He smiled at her.

"It's not over yet."

He took her hand and walked her to the pier, where a small boat waited.

She became reluctant then, pulling on his hand to make him stop. He turned and looked at her.

"The day wouldn't be complete without a boat tour through the port of Los Angeles. I'll keep you safe."

But her eyes told him that wasn't the problem. Their closeness was getting to her, and she started to look raw and nervous, her eyes glistening with unshed tears as if she wouldn't be able to hold them back much longer.

He gripped her hand tighter.

"Don't be scared," he whispered, "I'm here."

But he knew it was a lie, the worst of all. She would wake up alone come next morning, and nothing would have changed. Only the ache in her heart would be so much bigger.

He helped her entering the boat and sat down next to her, nodding to the driver before he put his arm around her shoulder when the motor softly hummed to life. The moment his hand came to lie on her bare upper arm, he realized she'd been right: this was a terrible mistake.

He brushed his fingers over her skin and felt goose bumps rise, and his body hummed to life as well. A shiver covered him like a piece of soft fabric, her small, firm body snuggling up against his much larger frame, her warmth seeping through his clothes. He pulled her even closer and pushed his face against her hair, inhaling her scent, fresh and sweet, wrapping around his senses.

Her breath was shallow, a little scared, but he couldn't stop. She turned slightly, her breasts pressing against his chest, and he cursed himself for not ending the night when he still could have done so, for doing this to her when she was so vulnerable to him already.

But when she looked at him, a question, a confession poised in her eyes, he stopped her from voicing it the only way he could. With the caress of his lips. Her taste was the most wonderful he had ever tried, gently detonating on his taste buds like fireworks, whisperingly sweet like a blend of chocolate and cream. He groaned into her mouth and let his tongue invade as soon as her lips parted, her body so close now, not a speck of air between them. He grew hard, his pants feeling uncomfortably tight, and when her hand touched his chest, slowly gliding down over his abdomen, he found the power to stop, breaking the kiss on a horrified gasp.

He pushed her away, much rougher than he had meant to, but it was too late. He would break her heart, and it was all his fault.

He looked at her, saw her fight for composure.

He forced himself to look away.

They finished the tour in silence, both too tired, too desperate to say anything, too occupied to see much around them. Too sad to do anything to make it better.

But when they were about to part in front of their hotel, he turned one last time, catching her eyes, bright as stars.

„Lisbon- please, understand. I can't do this. Not with Red John threatening to kill everything I love. Putting you in my life as my woman would mean to paint a target on your back- I can't do that. It's not because I don't want this- I do. It's not because I don't love you- god, Teresa, I DO. But before Red John is gone, I can't cross this bridge. I don't expect you to wait for me, my sweet. Find happiness, a man who can give you what you need, a future, peace, safety. Try to forget what you feel for me."

She shook her head, slowly, but full of sad determination.

"You know I can't."

"Then we both are doomed."

He leaned over and kissed her cheek, her skin so soft and warm, her unique taste brushing against his lips.

And then he turned and walked away.

TBC

_Don't worry! Next chapter will earn this story the M-rating- PROMISE! They don't stay sad for long! See you tomorrow!_


	5. Chapter 5

_Okay- THIS CHAPTER IS TOTALLY RATED M! For sex (Rothelena-sex, which means on the rough side, I'm not into Tantric lovemaking, sorry…) and a little language._

_I'd like to apologize to Little-Firestar84… I can't do it. I'm a loser. Whenever I try to put Lisbon in charge between the sheets… Jane takes control. I don't know why I always make him pretty dominant and animal, but it might have something to do with my NEED to see him lose control: I like him OUT OF HIS MIND, so that's where I put him in my stories._

_I also like it on the show, although it's rare that we see him that way- but: when he said the famous "Love You", he lost control a little, and I loved it. I really hope we'll see something like that again in season 6! Until then, I only have my stories, where I can bring out the beast in Jane… sorry for that!_

_After this chapter, there will be one more, so it will come up to 6 chapters all in all!_

_THIS CHAPTER IS DEFINITELY SUPER SMUTTY! SO IF YOU ARE SQUEAMISH IN THAT REGARD- BETTER NOT! Let me warn some more: outrageous SMUHUHUTTTTTT ahead! TRESPASS ON YOUR OWN RISK! Okay- enough? Let's start, then!_

_Disclaimer: I don't own The Mentalist, and I don't make money from fan fiction!_

Chapter 5

The dark side of love for sure, and Lisbon could have happily spent her life without experiencing it.

Even brushing her teeth almost felt like too much of an effort, every movement mechanical, meaningless. She dropped her clothes where she stood, dressed in the next oversized, shapeless shirt she could find and slipped between her sheets, immediately curling into a small ball of misery.

Blindly groping for the lamp, she switched off the lights and prepared to cry herself to sleep.

Two minutes later, she switched the lights on again and frowned, sitting up ramrod straight.

Wait a moment- Hadn't she told her brothers on countless occasions that nobody shaped their lives but themselves? Hadn't she always fought her battles alone, never relying on others to get her what she wanted? Since when did she buy depressive shit from anyone?

He loved her, but couldn't be with her, because it meant putting her into danger? That was miserable Romeo and Juliet crap, and she was done with that! Star-crossed lovers, my ass…. She jumped out of bed and stormed out the door, not bothering with pants or other unimportant stuff before she left the room. Patrick Jane would never know what hit him, because if he wasn't ready to give her what she wanted, she would damn well take it!

Standing in front of his room, she tried to catch her breath and regain some composure… ahh, fuck composure.

She hammered against the door as hard as she could, making the wood rattle in its frame.

Only silence answered her; her frown deepened.

So he played dead now, refusing to face her? The hell he would.

"Jane," she growled menacingly, but with deadly calm, "if you don't open that door right now, I would step away from it ASAP if I were you, because I swear, I'm gonna kick it in! I'm going to count to ten. One… two… three…"

She heard him unlock with a slight rattle, and the door swung open.

He looked as awful as she had felt twenty minutes ago, before adrenaline had started to wreak havoc on her quiet depression. There was quite some puzzlement in his eyes, as if it took him a few minutes to emerge from the cocoon of sadness he'd been hiding in.

"What do you think you're doing, Lisbon? Are you crazy?"

But his voice was sad and forlorn, his eyes begging her to let it go, just leave him alone. She was beyond the point of no return though, and this would be brought to an end this very night. She would have him or die trying.

She showed him the perfect cop stance, making him back off into his room, slamming the door behind her.

Her voice was lethally calm and threateningly soft.

"To be honest, Jane- yes. That's exactly what I am."

She saw his eyes change, realization dawning. When he spoke again, his voice was firm and determined.

"I swear, Lisbon, I won't put you in even more danger. If you're intent on seeing this through, you'll have to force me. And I won't make it easy for you."

She looked down to the front of his pants, tenting over a towering, enormous erection. Her mouth watered.

"Sure," she crooned, "I'll totally have to force you, I can see that."

The corners of his mouth twitched, but he didn't lose his ruthless resolve.

"I won't do this, Lisbon. I told you that I want you, and heavens, that's true. But I won't do it. I won't give in."

She crossed her arms over her chest.

"Get your clothes off."

His frown deepened.

"Why in hell should I do that?"

"Because I'm giving you a direct order."

"You can't order me to undress!"

"You're mine. I can."

He sighed, averting his gaze for a second, trying to swallow the pain he was no doubt feeling. His Adam's apple bopped frantically.

"I'm…. I'm not yours, Lisbon."

"You. Are. Get your clothes off or I swear I'm gonna rip them off, every single piece."

"Why are you doing that?"

"You think I let Red John ruin our lives for good? Think again."

He made a step in her direction, but stopped himself at the last second.

"We both don't have a choice about that, Teresa. He destroyed mine when he killed my family. And yours the moment I entered your life. There's no choice."

She walked up to him, until her body touched his. She could feel his discomfort, the urge to flee, his need for her making him pant as soon as his hard-on brushed her abdomen.

"There's always a choice, Jane. And this is mine."

She grabbed the lapels of his vest and tore as hard as she could, almost surprised at how easily the fabric fell apart under her hands. She moved on to his shirt, sending the buttons flying while he just stared into her eyes, shaking his head slowly, again and again.

"No, Teresa," he whispered, "don't do this, please. I will leave CBI, you'll never see me again. You'll be able to forget me then."

"Too late, Patrick," she answered, her voice sounding breathless to her own ears, "much too late."

She pulled her shirt over her head, the only piece of clothing she wore.

And as soon as she was naked, the game changed.

Jane's pupils dilated into fathomless dark pools, his lips pulling back from his teeth in an almost animal snarl. Before she could move he grabbed her and pushed her against the next wall, her back connecting with an audible thud.

He went for her neck like a starving lion, sucking her skin between his teeth until she could almost feel the hickey forming, the sharp sting heightening her arousal until she was squirming against his hard body.

Her hands wandered down his front, his rigid muscles rippling under her palms while he gasped with delight, his hips undulating against hers in the need to get closer. She fumbled with his belt and the damn pants, passion violent between them, her back thudding against the wall again and again, erratic movements, designed for nothing but more contact. He pushed her trembling hands aside and opened his pants himself, kicking off shoes and socks in his frantic chase for nakedness, just like she was, and all she wanted was him to melt into her as fast as he could.

When he was finally, blissfully naked, his hot skin rubbing against hers everywhere, he grabbed her buttocks and lifted her slowly, all the time claiming her mouth with frenzied love-bites, teeth, tongues, fevered lips clashing in their wild longing for each other. No matter how rough his caresses got, she wanted more, mirroring his touches with equal desire, wrapping her legs around his hips when he directed her to do so. His true size registered when his hard length rubbed against her soaking wet sex, swollen for him, covering his erection in her silky juices. Damn, he was huge, and her whole body seemed to hum in anticipation, she wasn't scared to be filled to the brim, not when it was by him.

She reached down between their bodies, spreading his pre-come all over his length, her fingers sliding easily through the mixture of seed and her own juices. He twitched beneath her touch, groaning into her mouth with desperate arousal.

She gasped when he lifted her further, breaking the kiss in the process. She looked at him and shuddered with delight. His eyes were wild, hungry, miles away from his usual controlled self. They were sparkling at her, lust like a light inside them, and she curled her fingers around his biceps to spur him on.

Jane growled and lowered her onto his enormous erection.

The first deep slide of penetration made everything go black around her for a second. He was so wide, so hard, she could almost feel the ridges of his length rubbing over her sensitive walls, going deeper, deeper, stretching her until a drop of pain blossomed inside her lower body, making the pleasure that much more real. She clutched at his shoulders, inhaling the sweet scent of his hair, tightly winding her arms around his neck, her frantic breath gushing against his ear.

He firmly impaled her with a motion that wouldn't stop, invading her, giving her the melting sensation she had craved so much. Once he filled her completely, being so deep that she could feel his movements in every niche of her body, he paused.

"Now you're mine," he whispered, his voice little more than a faint stirring of air, "I can never let you go without losing myself."

"Hold onto me then." She breathed, and his first hard thrust made her tighten her legs around him reflexively in her desperate try to diffuse some of the tension.

She felt close to bursting, and the feeling increased every time he surged back into her, holding her hips in a death-grip to guide her along his cock. Every time he drove home to the hilt she thought she wouldn't be able to take it, but he made her, his hands so strong on her body it made her soar with lust.

Her groans got louder and louder every time he made impact, her whole body shaking under his vigorous thrusts, the tension coiled low in her core, itching harder every time he pushed into her again, until she wailed with ecstasy, the sensations mounting in an earth-shattering explosion. She fisted her hands in his hair while she came so hard it knocked the air from her lungs, contracting around him so violently it made him cry out.

She hadn't had time to come down from the delirious high when she heard his voice as if from a great distance, floating through the haze of her pleasure.

"Sorry, Teresa, but I have to take you really hard now."

He pulled out, making her cry out in protest, and more or less threw her onto his bed. She moved to a half-sitting position, supporting her torso on her elbows, watching him intently.

He was so hard his erection was almost slapping his stomach, and damn, was he huge. His skin was streaked with rivulets of sweat, his face dark and intent. She couldn't help it, she wanted him again, her body shaking from all the adrenaline, the sheer force of her desire.

And Jane's slow smile was deep and dangerous.

Xxxxxxxxxx

He had no idea what was happening with him. He hadn't felt like this in a lifetime, a strange freedom stretching out inside of him like a vast landscape, filling his soul with a wild, raw kind of peace, allowing him to see everything clearer, more three-dimensional.

And still all he knew was that he had to have her again.

It was unbelievable how small she was, she had almost strangled him when he'd taken her, rutting deep inside her excruciatingly tightness, his cock swelling further with every thrust he'd taken. All he knew was that he needed more, as if he were sealing a contract, tying her to him forever.

He crawled over her naked body, so pale, freckled, slender. His little elfin princess who induced her belief in fairy tales back into him.

When she spread her legs for him he growled and lost all remnants of self-control. Thrusting his hips forward, he entered her in one sure stroke, cleaving through her tight flesh with wild pleasure. She raked her fingernails over his bare back, heightening every sensation he felt, and he knew exactly what she wanted.

Holding her still for his thrusts, he established a hard, pounding rhythm, muscles straining to satisfy his woman, give her everything he had.

She arched her slim body beneath him, struggled against his grip, her core once again poised for orgasm. Her touch was rough and unrestrained, making him wilder, crazy with need.

She surprised him when she pushed him off her, rolling over so she came out on top. Lying spread out beneath her, he smiled a breathless smile while she showed him that she could give as good as she got. She rode him hard, slamming down onto his straining cock, sending liquid ecstasy up and down his spine. Every nerve ending inside his lower body fired like mad, it felt perfect and overwhelming at the same time, she flexed her internal muscles around him and made him scream.

He pushed her off him so violently that she landed on her stomach at the outer edge of the mattress, and he was on her like a pouncing panther ready to devour its prey. She barely managed to rise to all fours before he drove into her to the hilt, his cock going so deep in this position her scream was primal. He felt her tender tissue stretching for him again, so tight and soft and hot, heaven, paradise, he was where he had always wished to be these past years.

She whimpered his name while he fucked her like a maniac, rough, deep thrusts filling her with a force that made her come immediately, her whole body going rigid beneath him while she muffled her screams with his pillow. Jane continued to slam into her, driving his rod into her wet heat again and again, his cock massaged by her relentlessly contracting walls.

He grabbed her hair and pulled her head back, showering her jaw with kisses while his thrusts grew erratic, her body shaking under the force of every deep stroke he fed her. Her sheath was dripping, and she came again, making her sex even tighter around him. He pressed her down with his weight and pushed as deep as he could before he felt the mind-blowing strength of his own eruption inside her.

The spurts were powerful and voluminous, filling her so thoroughly a large amount of seed seeped out of her core immediately, spread by the soft movements of his hips which still drove his cock in and out of her while he spew his semen in copious quantities.

He groaned into her ear, the sensations so close to making him pass out his mouth went dry, his arms pressing her closer to him, never to let go. It took him forever to finish, it felt as if he were pouring his true essence into her, leaving him drained and stunned, unable to stay upright in any way. He rolled to the side to spare her the strain of his bulk and collapsed, facedown, panting, the sweat cooling his fevered skin.

She climbed onto his back, warming him all over, her slight weight grounding him pleasantly, reassuring him that she was really here. She pressed sweet, tiny kisses onto his neck and shoulders, and he groaned when his body impossibly stirred again.

"No, please." He groaned. "I'm in off-mode for at least a few weeks."

She chuckled and rolled off him, pushing him onto his back which took her quite some effort. Her kisses wandered down his torso, soft, hot, luscious lips, leaving a trail of additional wetness while he squirmed beneath her.

When she kissed his shaft he noticed that he was still semi-hard, and when she allowed his cock to slide deep into the recesses of her throat, he immediately went rock-hard with a helpless groan. She sucked him luxuriously, taking her sweet time, not rushing to his orgasm at all. It drove him insane, and in no time he was digging his fingers into the sheets, gritting his teeth in sheer despair while she swept her tiny tongue through the highly sensitive slit at the tip of his towering erection. His whole body jerked from the sensation.

He brushed a trembling hand through her hair, watching her with a fevered gaze, a passionate tenderness for her searing his heart like a flame.

She owned him, body and soul, he loved her more than anything else in the world, and he was tired of fighting.

When she was about to swallow him again, he stopped her roughly, swiftly bringing her body beneath his.

Ready to take her again and again.

TBC

_Okay, last chapter up tomorrow. Then they'll talk- a little. But the chapter will still be totally absolutely completely ADULT-RATED! Hope you enjoyed that, leave some feedback (anonymously if you like) and SEE YOU TOMORROW!_


	6. Chapter 6

_Last chapter, rated A SOLID M, which means it will get totally SMUTTY! But if you survived the last chapter, you'll have nothing to fear!_

_Disclaimer: I don't own The Mentalist, and I don't make money from fan fiction._

Chapter 6

Patrick Jane woke up in a somewhat hangover-like state inside a tangle of sheets, lying somewhere on the floor between bed and door. He felt every single muscle on his body, among them some he had never noticed before. Upon closer inspection, he found that Lisbon clung to his chest like a small kitten afraid of drowning, fast asleep, her hair a wild mess around her head.

Her slender, naked body was plastered to his, and her silky dark curls tickled his nipples, which grew into hard peaks in reaction.

He groaned. Love washed over him like a flash flood, and while he was so scared his whole mind seemed to be aflutter, his heart was all hers, the bridge crossed, their lives entangled.

"I love you." He whispered, and it was his heart's truth, something he would never again be able to lie about.

But unfortunately, he urgently needed to use the bathroom.

Carefully extricating himself from her tight embrace, he rose and picked her up, gently putting her down on the mattress before he covered her with the softest blanket he could find. Still asleep, she blindly groped for him, targeting all the right spots, making him moan.

"Sorry, love. I'll be right back." He whispered.

Five minutes later he stood in front of the mirror, pushing both hands through his disheveled hair, the muscles in his arms groaning in protest. Heavens, what a night.

He had stopped counting how often they had done it around midnight, because she had practically attacked him as soon as they had finished another round, her passion and vigor igniting his own time and again, his love for her making him oblivious to anything but her, them, the sensations they had built together.

He sighed and grinned at his reflection.

Damn, Jane, you're an old man. What were you thinking, getting yourself such a little firecracker?

His grin deepened, a shy happiness filling his heart. He couldn't help it, he was glowing from it.

He sighed and was about to turn when a certain small, warm, naked woman wrapped her arms around him from behind and stopped him. He put his hands on hers, gently caressing her fingers before he reached behind him and pulled her around to his front.

"Good morning," He whispered.

She leaned against the sink with a sassy smile.

"Morning."

Her voice was soft and sleepy, just looking at her made him hard again. He pulled her close, leaning down to fasten his lips over her pulse.

"I'm still angry at you," he murmured, showering her neck with kisses, "for seducing me, you disrespectful little witch."

She chuckled.

"Yes- I'm a mean bad-ass. And I totally forced you, of course."

He grinned.

"Oh yes. You crashed through my defenses like a bulldozer. You ordering me to undress was just too close to my favorite sexual fantasy…"

She pressed warm, wet kisses on his throat and collarbones.

"Just close? What was missing?"

"Weeeelll… in my fantasy, we usually are in your office."

She snorted.

"My office? Forget it."

"Don't you dare to challenge me, woman…"

He claimed her lips in a soul-searing-devouring kiss, letting his tongue play with his until he could feel her whole body burn with lust, squirming against him in her need to crawl into him.

He wrapped his arms around her, holding her tight.

"How will I protect you, Teresa? My mind is reeling, and I'm so scared."

She looked at him, framing his face with her hands.

"Someone once told me it's better to regret the things you've done than those you haven't. We would have ruined our lives pining for each other, Patrick. Can't you see I'm done playing the victim when I can just as well fight for the most precious moments of happiness? I'm HAPPY now, and I know you are, too. That's all I need to know for now."

She went on tiptoes and kissed his ear.

"We'll get him. We'll be even stronger together. Don't stop believing, Jane."

She pulled back, her eyes moist and soulful.

"I love you."

He groaned and put his forehead against hers.

"I love you, too, Teresa. So, so much. It's just… I can't lose…"

She put her fingers over his lips.

"Shhhh… you won't lose me. Please, love- don't give up hope now."

With a desperate sound he pulled her into his arms, pressing his lips on hers like a starving man. The kiss grew wild and frantic fast, tongues sliding against each other, his hard cock throbbing between them. He got antsy and excited and knew he needed to have her again.

"What do we do now?" she whispered into his mouth.

He broke the kiss and pretended to ponder the question.

"Well… since a certain someone pretty much drained me of all my bodily fluids last night, I'd go with drinking ridiculous amounts of tea… after taking a shower."

"Can I join you?"

"No. I won't have sex again for at least a month, so don't try to tempt me, you impertinent little minx."

He smiled gently at her, his tenderness for her making him so soft and needy he just wanted to sink into her and never leave the tightness of her body again.

She wrapped her hand around his cock, taking care to rub all the right places in the process.

He groaned for all he was worth, the various aches in his muscles forgotten.

"Okay, maybe this once- but don't think you'll get your hands on me again afterwards!"

He knew his eyes told her he would never let her out of his sight again. He fully intended to keep her close, where he could watch and hold her, give her everything he could. The center of his world.

He kissed her roughly, digging his fingers into her cheeks to make her open her mouth wide, covering her hand around his shaft with his own to make her press harder.

He didn't even need to check if she was wet for him- if he had learned one thing about her last night, it was that his by-the-book, reasonable little Lisbon knew exactly what she wanted, and the way she arched her hips against his told him how much she craved him inside of her.

He broke the kiss and looked at her, raising his chin in pretended arrogance, challenging her to tease the lion. Play with fire.

She rubbed his shaft hard, just the way he liked it, and he growled low in his throat, pulling her hair to make her offer her throat to him. Gently pushing his teeth against the side of her neck, he smiled when she shuddered violently in his arms.

"Shower." He whispered and made her shriek in surprise when he picked her up, not setting her down until they were inside the spacious shower stall.

Jane calmly perused the choice of shower gel before he turned his attention back to her.

Again, his smile wasn't reassuring at all.

Xxxxxxxxx

She was shaking like a leaf, adrenaline and lust coursing through her veins like sweet poison. It was unhealthy how much she still wanted him, after hours of rough sex last night, after he had taken her again and again, until they had fallen asleep from sheer exhaustion.

Jane was surprisingly strong, so strong, and she loved how she could make him lose control, forget all about his gentlemanly manners and just fuck the living daylights out of her. Her toes curled in anticipation when he turned the water on and stepped under the spray, clear water cascading down his body. He ignored her for a few minutes, his hands sliding over his skin, touching areas she regarded as hers, until she finally had enough. She sank to her knees in front of him and started kissing his rock-hard shaft under his stern gaze.

She closed her eyes in bliss. She would never get enough of him, his taste so unique, made for her, hot and wild and fresh, her hands brushing over his wet skin while the warm water ran over her aroused body. When she swallowed him, moaning from the pleasant sensation of his girth sliding down her throat, he softly grabbed her hair and started to thrust, gently, a careful, sliding motion that made her tremble with pleasure.

Her hand wandered over the inside of her thigh, approaching her sex, soaking wet for him, when his harsh voice stopped her.

"Uh-uh, Lisbon. You don't get to do that- I do."

He made her release him and pulled her upright, his hand sliding over her abdomen before he pushed it between her legs. Two fingers entered her immediately, his thumb rubbing over her clit again and again.

Lisbon grabbed his wrist, frantically searching for something to hold on to, but it didn't stop him one bit. She went on tiptoes when the keening sensations mounted, his hot lips kissing and gently biting her neck while his fingers invaded her roughly until she screamed with ecstasy. She came in a major explosion, every muscle in her lower body tensing before she let everything go in a mind-blowing eruption, Jane's kisses getting more and more passionate when his own excitement increased.

He brought her down slowly, making sure she could stand on her own before he pulled his fingers out. She was almost surprised they were still in the shower, warm water pouring down on her, his hands sliding through the wetness before he turned her away from him, making her face the shower wall. He put her hands against the smooth glass, and she splayed her fingers for leverage, arousal humming in every fiber of her body. She was distinctly sore from last night, but it felt good, intoxicating, and the thought that he would shove his cock into her in a second made her shiver with anticipation.

He spread her legs briskly and leaned forward to whisper into her ear.

"Slow and gentle, my love?"

She cried out.

"God, NO!"

He chuckled.

It was all the incentive he needed. Curling his fingers over old bruises, he caused an arousing sting that made her gasp in pleasure even before he took her breath away by slamming into her, his hard cock making her sore walls burn with its ruthless slide. Again she felt owned, possessed, his length reaching so deep he filled her utmost recesses, her mouth falling open on a breathless scream, every muscle once more poised in near-orgasm.

When he started to pound into her, so hard the glass of the shower stall rattled with every merciless thrust, she cried out in bliss, the feelings he gave her so strong her knees wobbled. The sounds he made were utterly erotic, her restrained, controlled consultant shamelessly groaning, shouting his pleasure, picking up speed when his own lust for her demanded more force. She followed the rhythm of the slight pain she felt whenever he rammed his cock against her cervix, the ache hurting so good it just took him a handful of deep thrusts to make her come.

It felt incredible to be taken by him while she convulsed all around him, her body quaking under the frantic staccato of his thrusts until the friction sent her into multiple orgasm, renewing her arousal every time she was close to coming down. Her walls were slick with their combined juices, making it possible for him to keep up his speed despite her tightness, and he pushed in balls deep every time he made impact, his loud moans indicating it felt as good for him as it did for her. She cried out again when he gave a mighty roar and gave into his orgasm with a violent shudder, the force of his ejaculation so massive it felt like a punch.

He held her in place, and the images inside her head made her release that much sweeter. Having him come inside her body, shooting his balmy load into her without restraints felt like a gift, he was finally hers, holding nothing back. The warm liquid he spilled in copious spurts felt wonderful on her flaming walls, and she sighed in relief while delicious aftershocks made her body twitch.

Jane gave a last, soft, thoroughly satisfied sigh and pulled her upright so that her back came to lie against his front. He wrapped his arms around her, his cock still firmly embedded inside of her, lips nuzzling her neck while the shower spray continued to wet their skin.

Still refusing to leave the heat of her body, Jane took one of the bottles from the little metal shelf and opened it, pouring some of the fragrant shower gel into his hand. He started washing her gently, taking special care of her sensitive, aching breasts, giving her soft, shallow thrusts from time to time. His soapy hand found her straining clit and gave her another thorough, bone-melting climax, greedily swallowing her groans with his passionate, open-mouthed kiss.

He pulled out of her then, releasing a gush of hot seed onto her thighs, taking care to wash off all traces afterwards. She turned in his arms, and they continued to play with each other, gently washing their bodies, never stopping to kiss, taste, caress each other, until both of them were clean and sated.

Xxxxxxxxxx

When she came out of the bathroom wearing the dress-like shirt from last night, looking like the sunshine itself, he was just rolling the sleeves of his shirt up. Straightening his vest, he approached her slowly, pulling her into a close hug, chuckling cruelly when she winced.

"Guess who'll be thinking about me every time she moves for a week, huh?"

She slapped his chest playfully, and he caught her hand, guiding it to his lips for a sweet kiss.

They looked at each other, and the strength of his feelings made him shake inwardly. He had known what he felt for her was substantial. But nothing had prepared him for the depth of this love.

"What do we do now?" he said softly. "Do we keep it low?"

Her eyes were so huge, and he could read her thoughts as if she were whispering them into his ear.

"Do you really think he doesn't know?"

"Don't make me more frightened than I already am, please."

She kissed his throat, and her lips on his skin gave him enormous comfort. He gently leaned into her embrace.

"I want us to be realistic about this," she said, "I think everything we can do is watch out, like we always did. He does know, Jane. Maybe he knew before we did."

"Of course he did." He nodded bitterly.

"We are together now, Jane. He won't get us as long as we act as a team."

"You underestimate him, Teresa, he can take everything…"

"He won't. Patrick, if we lose hope, we have nothing. I love you."

His eyes softened.

"I love you, too. You know that, my sweet. What about Bertram?"

She shrugged.

"You're a consultant, not an agent. He'll find a loop hole to keep you with the team."

He pulled her closer.

"He could be Red John, Lisbon."

He felt her mood change, her lips forming a soft pout.

"In that case, he'd definitely know what I feel for you."

He frowned.

"How?"

"When he wanted to talk to me during the Lorelei Martins affair? He asked me if I had ever thought about what had happened between you and her when she… well, abducted you. And I… couldn't guard my expression fast enough."

"Oh, Teresa."

He held her tight, close to his heartbeat, thundering rapidly just because of her.

"Shhh," he whispered, "I'm here now. I'm sorry I hurt you. I never meant to. I love you. We'll deal with it… all of it, I swear."

He pulled back a little and kissed her, her taste so sweet, a purity and innocence he had never really owned. And his, finally his. He gently pushed his tongue into her mouth, not forcing anything, following her lead. He loved to feel her hands in his hair, the softly moving fingers on his scalp, pulling him into the kiss. He moaned with delight before he ended the contact with a slight smacking sound.

"We'll be inseparable from now on," he said, "and I'm hell to live with."

She chuckled.

"I can't imagine that it can get worse. Just be careful, Jane. Very careful. And don't scram in the middle of the night, NEVER again."

"Dito. I need you close, Lisbon. I'll be hysterically over-protective. Please, humor me."

She nodded and kissed him again.

He would never get enough of her kiss, so soft and warm, reminding him of everything that held meaning.

Her voice was sweet and whispery.

"So- we don't hide?"

He pondered the question for a moment. She was right, of course- he knew. Red John would know immediately, and it sent a hot shudder of fear through his veins. But Lisbon already WAS a target, had been so for years, and nothing he did could change that- only getting rid of Red John once and for all could save them. And that's what he would do- he needed to. Now more than ever.

"We don't hide. There are still a lot of things left I want you to see, and since we don't know when we'll get a holiday again- let's go for it."

She smiled and took his hand. Hers was so much smaller than his, and he couldn't help thinking how vulnerable she was after all- she was his to protect now, and there wasn't a responsibility he would take more seriously.

She pressed another warm kiss on his lips.

"But first- I need to dress at my hotel room, then breakfast and ridiculous amounts of tea."

He groaned.

"You don't really think we'll leave your hotel room without having sex again, do you?"

She gave him a blinding smile.

"We'll see about that. We're on holidays, after all."

She opened the door and led the way, granting him an enticing view of her backside. Jane looked around the room for a last time, sighing in bliss.

And left an extra generous tip for the chambermaid.

The End

_I have an idea for a sequel, with Jane and Lisbon sightseeing in L.A., having sex in appropriate/inappropriate places… so I might write that, we'll see. Thank you so much for reading this story, your feedback means the world to me! See you very soon!_


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